Yawcob Strauss and Other Poems/L-E-G on a Mule




 * Did you hear of the accident, just t'other day,
 * That occurred to a youth of the Y. M. C. A. ?


 * One morning, while walking out with his friend Neff,—
 * M. W. G. M. of the I. O. O. F.,—


 * His friend exclaimed suddenly, "Look there, I say!
 * There's a chance for the S. F. P. O. C. T. A.!"


 * A "broth of a boy," who was just from a spree,
 * Was cruelly beating his m-u-l-e.


 * Our hero stepped up to expostulate, when
 * The mule kicked his a-b-d-o-m-e-n.


 * This doubled him up with a half-muttered phrase,
 * As foot No. 2 knocked him e-n-d-ways.


 * They bore him home gently, as gently could be,
 * And gave him a pint of hot l-oo-t.


 * A voltaic plaster they placed, sans delay,
 * Where that treacherous mule left his m-a-r-k.


 * A hip dislocated; a general jar;
 * Striking proofs of "one-mule p-o-w-e-r."


 * When the patient first spoke, what d'ye s'pose he did say,—
 * This model young man of the Y. M. C. A.?


 * Says he, "I'll be b-l-o-w-e-d
 * If ever I'll plead for a m-u-l-e!"