Translation:Shulchan Aruch/Yoreh Deah/385

Seif 1: A mourner is forbidden to engage in greetings. How does this work? For the first three days he does not greet anyone and if others do not know that he is mourning and greet him, he should not respond to them. Rather, he should inform them that he is mourning. From the third to the seven day, he should not greet people, but if others do not know that he is mourning and greet him, he should respond. From the seventh day to the 30th day, he can greet others, for they are dwelling peacefully, but others should not greet him. And all the more so, he can respond to one who greets him. After 30 days he is like any other person. To what does this [the previous laws] refer? For his other relatives, but for his father and mother, he can greet others after seven days but others should not greet him until after 12 months. ''Rema: And since he is forbidden from greeting, all the more so [is he forbidden from] being overly talkative. But if he is acting for the honor of the public, for example, many people are coming to greet comfort him, he is permitted to say to them, “go home in peace,” because this is permitted for the honor of the public. And there are those who are lenient in this age [regarding] greeting a mourner after 30 days, and they don’t have a [good]reason, unless they will make a distinction and say that that which we do is not called [i.e. considered like] the “greeting” that was in their day''

Seif 2:	One who finds his fellow a mourner in the first 30 days, he should comfort him but should not greet him. After 30 days he can greet him, but should not comfort him in the usual manner, rather in an subtle way, namely, that he should not mention to him the name of the deceased, rather he should say to him, “be comforted.” If his wife died and he married someone else, one should not enter [the mourner’s] house to comfort him. If he found him in the marketplace he should say to him, “be comforted,” in a soft voice and with seriousness. But if he has not remarried he should comfort him until 3 festivals have passed. And for one’s father or mother one should comfort him all 12 months and after 12 months one should comfort him in an subtle way.