Page:Witty and entertaining exploits of George Buchannan.pdf/15

( 15 ) travel through Italy, and ſeveral other foreign countries, and after ſeven years, returned with the ſame dreſs he went off in and entering the College took poffeſſion of his feat there, but the Profeſſor in his room quarrelled him for ſo doing, Says George, it is a very odd thing that a man cannot take a walk in his ſlippers but another will take up his feat. And ſo let the other Profeſſor about his buſineſs.

George was met one day by three biſhops, who paid him the following compliments. Says the firſt, Good day father Abraham; ſays the ſecond. Good day father Iſaac; ſays the third, Good father Jacob. To whom he replied, 'I am neither father Abraham, father Iſaac, nor father Jacob; but I am "Soul the ſon of Kiſh, ſent out to ſeek my father's aſſes, and loǃ" I have found three of them.' Which anſwer convinced the biſhops that they had miſtaken their man.

A poor Scotchman dined one day at a public houſe in London, upon eggs and not having money to pay,' got credit till he would return, the man being lucky in trade, acquired vaſt riches, and after ſome years returned, and calling as the houſe where he was owing his dinner of eggs, aſked the landlord what he had to pay for his dinner of eggs he had from him ſuch a time; but the landlord ſeeing him now rich, gave him a bill of ſome hundred pounds, telling him s his reason for ſo extravagant a charge. That theſe eggs had they been hatched, would have been chicken, and theſe ſaying more eggs, would have been more chickens; and ſo on multiplying the eggs and their product, till ſuch a time their value ſhould amount to the ſum he charged. The man refuſing to comply with this demand, was charged before a judge; but, in the mean time made his affair known to George Buchanan his countryman, who promiſed to appear in the hour of cauſe; which he accordingly did all in a weat, with a great baſket of boiled peaſe; which appearance ſurpriſed the judge, who aſked him what he meant by theſe boiled peaſe? ſays George I am going to ſow them; When will they grow ſays the judges.-They will grow when ſodden eggs grow chickens. Which anſwer convinced The judge of the extravagance of the Engliſhman's demand, and the Scotſman was aſtoilzed upon paying two-peace half-penny.

There was a bell at Dalkeith, with the Popiſh clergy made uſe of, to extort confeſſion from the ignorant people, the following manner; They told the perſon whom they aſpected guilty, it would ring at the touch of a guilty per- n, but if not guilty, it would not; by theſe means they enerally frightened the ignorant into confeſſion; for if the ell would ring, the perſon was then to be condemned to death. But they managed the matter ſo, that the bell was