Page:Witty and entertaining exploits of George Buchanan (5).pdf/4

4 he goes, where the duel was appointed. So, when George saw his enemy coming against him, all in glittering armour, armed with sword and spear, he made up to him with all the speed his horse could carry him; when the small stones made such a rattling noise, that the gentleman's fine gelding would not stand the battle, but ran away and threw his master to the ground, which caused all the spectators to laugh, and say the gentleman was more fool than Gcorge. The gentleman being still more enraged at this second affront, he would fight with George on foot; but his friends persuaded him that it would be no honour for him to fight and kill the King's fool, and far less to be killed by the fool; so they were advised both to agree. But the gentleman would try another exploit with George, for to have it said he was still the cleverest man, viz. To hold him a jumping bout publicly, the next day thereafter. With all my heart, says George; and we will end in and about where we began: they not knowing his meaning in this. The place and hour being set where they were to meet next morning, George in the night time caused a deep pit to be made, and the earth of it carried away: then filled it up with dung from a privy, and covered it over with green turf, that it might not be known from the other ground. So, according to promise, they both met in the morning against the appointed time. Now George being the oldest man, and by them counted the greatest fool the young spark permitted him to jump first, which he according to order did; and jumped within a foot of the place where the ground was falsified. The young man seeing this, made his performance with great airs, and all his might, so that he jumped a foot over George, and up to his oxters in clean dung; whereat the whole