Page:Witty and entertaining exploits of George Buchanan (5).pdf/10

10 stroke cut off the fellow's right hand, wherein he held the sword, so that both sword and hand fell to the ground; but George lifted his hand and carried it to the King. No sooner did he come before them, but they asked him, saying, Well, George, did you see any body to trouble you by the way, None, said he, but one fellow, who was going to take the money from me; but I made him give me his hand he would not do the like again. You did ? says the fellow's master. Yes, I did, says George, let work bear witness, throwing down the fellow's hand on the table before them all.

Now this last exploit of George's caused many of the English to hate him; and among the rest a young nobleman fell a joking with George, saying, he would be a famous champion for Scotland as Sir William Wallace was. Aye, aye, says George, Wallace was a brave man in his time. True indeed, says the young noblemen, but when he came to London, we did him all manner of justice; and for honour of the Scots, we have his effigy in our shit-houses to this very day. And do you not know the reason of that, says George; No I don't, says he. Well I'll tell you, said George, he was such a terror to Englishmen, when he was alive, that the sight of his picture yet makes them beshit themselves. The English took this answer as a great affront, and forthwith caused Wallace's picture to be taken out of all their shit-houses.

George happened one time to be in company with a bishop, and so they began to education, wherein he blanked the bishop so remarkably, that the bishop himself owned he was worsted.- Then one of the company addressed George with these words: Thou Scot should not have left thy country. For what reason, says George. Because