Page:Witty and entertaining exploits of George Buchanan (3).pdf/17

 always ready told him he was afraid to keckle lest he would come and snatch up the egg. Which rebuff made the 'squire walk off as mute as a fish.

George was met one day by three bishops who paid him the following compliments -- Says the first, Good day father Abraham: the second, Good day father Isaac; the third, Good-day, father Jacob. To which he replied, I am neither father Abraham, father Isaac, nor father Jacob; but I am Saul the son of Kish sent out to seek my fathers asses and lo! I have found three of them. Which answer convinced the bishops that they had mistaken their man.

There was a bell at Dalkeith which the Papist clergy made use of to extort confession from the ignorant people, in the following manner.—They told the persons who they suspected guilty, the bell would ring at the touch of a guilty person, but if not guilty it would not. By these means they geerally frightened the ignorant into confession; for if the bell would rive, the person was then to be condemned to death. But they managed the matter so that the bell was never brought to trial till George did as follows; he was imprisoned for saying, That the Pope was fallible himself, and could not pardon the sins of others. George owned he did so, but would refer to the bell whether he was guilty or not. The priests though unwilling were obliged to comply.—George touched the bell repeating as before, The Pope is fallible, and cannot pardon sin; moreover added, The Pope, and the Popish clergy are imposters; and thereupon touched the bell referring to it for the truth; but the bell not reacting, the priests were disgraced as imposters, George was honourably acquitted, and the bell was laid aside.

A young gentleman that would be witty on the