Page:Witty and entertaining exploits of George Buchanan (17).pdf/27

( 27 ) there came after him a fine gilded coach, which George was informed belonged to the Biſhop of Canterbury, and was going to London for his lordſhip. George addreſſed himſelf to the coachman for to have a paſſage with him in the coach to London: ſo he bargained with the coachman for two dollars, to carry him to the Bell Inn on London bridge; the one he gave him in hand and the other as ſoon as ever he would ſee him out of the coach door; ſo away the coachman drives for London in all haſte, in which time George wrote the following Motto:

Here ſits the Biſhop of Canterbury Who at the ſchools diſdain'd to tarry, Far better ſkill'd in games than preaching, And yet he lives by others teaching. Blind leaders of the blind indeed, 'Tis blind and lame who chariots need; Six brutes with eyes this brute doth carry, I mean the Biſhop of Canterbury. My feet being lame, I gave a dollar, To be drove in ſtate like you a ſcholar: For which myſelf I do abhor. Shame caus'd me make another door.

Theſe lines being battered upon the inſide of the coach, and when he came within a mile of London, took a knife and cut a great hole in the back ſide of the coach where he came out, and to make his promiſe good to the coachman that he was to give the other dollar as ſoon as ever he ſaw him come out of the coach door. The poor coachman drove on till he came to the foreſaid inn where he alighted and opened the door to let his paſſenger out, but ſeeing the coach empty and a great hole in the back ſide of it, he cried out he believed he had the devil in his coach, and he had taken away the backſide of it with him. The people of the inn came all flocking about to ſee what was done; and then ſeeing the lines in the inſide of the coach, which the biſhop came and red himſelf, they all concluded it to be done by George but could make nothing of it, for the biſhop ſaid, To purſue him would only make it worſe and no better.

George was invited one day by a great lawyer to come and ſee a fine building which he had lately built of fine free ſtones and marble. He deſired George to gueſs what it was built with; George anſwers, Do you think that I do not know what is is built with? No you do not ſays the lawyer. Yes, I do, ſays George, it cannot ſtand long for malice and hatred is the mortar of it, and the ſtones are the heads of fooliſh people, poliſhed over with the tongue of an aſs.-O ſir ǃ