Page:Witty and entertaining exploits of George Buchanan (15).pdf/19

 O F G E O R G E  B U C H A N A N.     19 A Candle-maker having had ſome candles ſtolen, was telling it in a company where George was preſent, who bade him be of good cheer, for in a ſhort time, ſays he, I am aſſured they will come to light. George, being ſent to Paris about ſome buſineſs, went from there to Varſailles, to ſee the French King's court; and being known there to ſeveral of the courtiers, who had, been at the Engliſh court, one of them took occaſion to tell the French King, that George was one of the wittieſt men in England; upon which the French King deſired to ſee him, which he did; but George, it ſeems, was out of humour, or at leaſt ſeemingly ſo, and ſpoke but little to the purpoſe; ſo that the French King told the nobleman that commended him for ſuch a wit, that he looked upon him as a very dull fellow; but the nobleman aſſured the King, that whatever he thought of him, George was a very witty and ingenious man; whereupon the King was reſolved to make further trial of him, and took him into a great gallery where there were abundance of fine pictures; and, among the reſt, ſhewed him the picture of Chriſt on the croſs; and aſked him, if he knew who that was but George made himſelf very ignorant, and anſwered, No. Why, ſays the King, I will tell you if you do not know: This is the picture of our Saviour on the croſs, and that on the right hand is the Pope's, and that on the left is my own. Whereupon George replied, I humbly thank your Majeſty for the information, for tho' I have often heard that our Saviour was crucified between two thieves, yet I never knew who they were before. A Sharper, who had acquired vaſt-riches by cheating, told George, that if ſuch a thing as a good name were to be purchaſed, he would freely give ten thouſand pounds for one. Sir, ſaid George, it would certainly be the worſt money you ever laid out in your life. Why ſo, ſaid the Sharper, Becauſe, anſwered he, you would loſe it in leſs than a week. One aſked George, Why men always made ſuit to the women, and women never to the men? Why, ſays he, Becauſe the women are always ready for the men, but the men are not always ready for the women. George went into the mint one day, when they were melting gold. One of them aſked George, if he would