Page:Witty and entertaining exploits of George Buchanan (10).pdf/9

 news from the Scots ſhepherds, came crowding in, to know what was done. No ſooner had the three gentlemen declared what was paſt between the clergyman and the ſhepherds, whom they found on the Scots border, but the old biſhop made anſwer, and think you, ſaid he, that a ſhepherd could anſwer theſe queſtions? It has been none elſe but the devil, or the Scots miniſters themſelves could not do it; they are but ignorant of ſuch matters; a parcel of beardleſs boys. Then George thought it was time to take ſpeech in hand. Well, my lord biſhop, ſays he, you call them a parcel of ignorant beardleſs boys, you have a great long beard yourſelf, my lord biſhop, and if the grace of God were meaſured by beards, you biſhops, and the goats will have it all, and that will be quite averſe to ſcripture. What, ſays the biſhop, are you a Scot? Yes, ſays George, I am a Scot: Well, ſays the biſhop, and what is the difference between a Scot and a ſot? Nothing at preſent, ſays George, but the breadth of the table, there being a table betwixt the biſhop and George; To the biſhop went off in a high paſſion, while the whole multitude were like to ſplit their jaws with laughter.

About this time there was an act of parliament for the benefit of murderers, that any perſon if they committed murder, if they forfeited 500 merks, which went under the name of Kin Boot, becauſe ſo much of this fine went to the murdered perſon's neareſt relation, as the price of blood, the murderer got a remit. Now George knowing this to be contrary to Moſes' laws, was very much grieved to ſee many pardons ſealed with the king's hand for murder, almoſt one every week; it being ſo uſual for the king to ſubſcribe them, that he would not read them, nor inquire what they were; for which cauſe George writes a right to the crown, and ſent it to the king to be ſubſcribed, which he actually did, and never looking what it was, returned it to George: no ſooner had he received it, but he goes to the king, and told him it was not time for him now to be ſitting there; Whereat the king, greatly amazed, ſtarted up, then George in a great haſte ſets himſelf down in the king's chair, forthwith declaring himſelf king, ſaying, You who was king muſt be my fool, for I am now the wiſeſt man. The king at this was greatly offended, until George ſhewed him his ſeal and ſuperſcription; but from that day forth the king knew what he ſubſcribed.