Page:Witty and entertaining exploits of George Buchanan (10).pdf/4

 of him: then George turned about ſuddenly, and clapping his hands with loud laughters; the king aſked him, what made him laugh ſo? Laugh, ſays George, how can I but laugh, when horſes cannot hold their peace? O my ſovereign, ſays he, don't you ſee how your horſes have rent all their chafts laughing at my old boots; then every man looking at his horſe's mouth, they were all in a rage againſt George, the king cauſed him to be diſmounted directly, and charged him never to let him ſee his face on Engliſh ground. Now George knowing that nothing could reconcile the king at this time, he came away to Scotland, and cauſed make him a pair of great boots, and put a quantity of Scottiſh earth in each of them, and away he goes for England to ſee the king once more. He hearing the king and his court was to paſs through a country village, George places himſelf up in an old window, and lets up his bare arſe to the king and his court as they paſſed by. The king was greatly amazed to ſee ſuch an unuſual honour done to him, was curious to know the performer; ſo he called unto him, aſking him to come down, and finding it to be George, Sir, ſays the king, did not I charge you never to let me ſee your face again? True, my ſovereign, ſays George, for which cauſe I let you ſee my arſe. Ay but ſays the king, you was never to come on Engliſh ground again. Neither I did, ſays George, pulling off his boots before the king, ſaying, Behold, my Sovereign, 'tis all Scots ground I ſtand upon.—The king and his court being ſo diverted with this merry joke, George was admitted again to the king's favour.

After this, there aroſe a debate betwixt the king and the queen about votes in the parliament; as the king had two votes, the queen would have one, and would needs be a parliamenter, or no peace without the preferment; this mat- ter was committed to George by the king; ſo it was agreed with the parliamenters that the Queen ſhould be admitted into parliament for a day; and accordingly ſhe came, and was received with all the honour and congratulations, as was due, and becoming her high ſtation; but before any matter of conſequence was brought to the board, George ſeated himſelf hard by the queen's ſeat; all being ſilent, he roſe up very quickly, and lifted one of his legs, and then gave a great fart, which ſet the whole houſe a laughing; whereat the Queen was greatly offended, crying, Go take the rogue and hang him; to which George anſwered, A fine parlia-