Page:Witty and entertaining exploits of George Buchanan (10).pdf/17

 George being ſent to Paris about ſome buſineſs, went from thence to Versailles, to ſee the French king's court: and being known there to ſeveral of the courtiers, who had been at the Engliſh court, one of them took occaſion to tell the French king, that George was one of the wittieſt men in England; upon which the French King deſired to ſee him, which he did; but George, it ſeem, was out of humour, or at leaſt ſeemingly lo, he ſpoke but very little to the purpoſe; ſo that the French King told the nobleman that commended him for ſuch a wit, that he looked upon him as a very dull fellow; but the nobleman aſſured the King, that whatever he thought of him, George was a very witty and ingenious man: whereupon the King was reſolved to make further trial of him, and took him into a great gallery, where there were abundance of fine pictures; and among the reſt, ſhewed him the picture of Chriſt on the croſs, and aſked him, if he knew who that was? but George made himſelf very ignorant, and anſwered, no, Why, ſays the king, I'll tell you, if you don't know; this is the picture of our Saviour on the crofs, and that on the right hand is the Pope's, and that on the left is my own. Whereupon George replied, I humbly thank your majeſty for the information, for though I have often heard that our Saviour was crucified between two thieves, yet I never knew who they were before.

A ſharper who had acquired vaſt riches by cheating, told George, that if ſuch a thing as a good name was to be purchaſed, he would freely give ten thouſand pounds for one. Sir, ſaid George, it would certainly be the worſt money you ever laid out in your life, Why ſo? ſaid the ſharper; becauſe, anſwered he, you will loſe it again in leſs than a week.

One aſked George, why men always made ſuit to the women, and the women never to the men? Why, ſays he, becauſe the women are always ready for the men, but the men are net always ready for the women.

George went into the mint one day, when they were melting gold, one of them aſked George, if he would have his hat full of gold? George readily accepted, but it burnt the bottom out of his hat, as they knew it would, and for that boot they fooled George. However, George, to be even with them, bought a fine large hat, and cauſed a plate of copper to be put betwixt the bet and the lining, and returned next day, they jeſtingly aſked him if he would have another hat-