Page:Two Mock Epics (Hanuman and Tantum Religio), Lyrics, Post Meridian Verse, The Turret Captain's Toast and other Verses.pdf/85

 Brief, every papist heart is full,

Like Phalaris roaring in his bull.

But unappalled and undismayed

The bold Sir Blasius rose, arrayed

In majesty, and two small bands

That flapped below his stubbly chin

Like Capricorn’s two dewlaps thin,

And from the window his tirade

Roared forth, the Bible in his hands,

And orbs to ill-tiled roofs upraised,

And lips that burned and nose that blazed.

So moribund aquatic fowl

Raise piteous eyes from reed-bound lands

While levin smites and thunders growl,

And mangy sheep crowd cheek by jowl.

I’m well aware that here should follow

That saintly Calvinist’s phillipic,

But recollect when papists holloa

Their logic method’s mostly hippic,

And what finds favor in the stable

Or ring, they bawl while they are able;

When lungs, as heads, are empty, whacks

Administer, or turn their backs.

On this occasion all the quarter

Was seething and bubbling like a water-

Spout, mud yolcano or tornado,

Just as it doubles up the dado

And irons out the cat and kittens

As flat as granny’s new silk mittens

The most intrepidest reporter

Had soon been doubled up as fans are

When hurricanes rage o’er Arkansa;