Page:Tseng Kuo Fan and the Taiping Rebellion.djvu/187

Rh working hard and not yielding to pride — in this way guarding the home and preventing much suffering."

He also confided to his family his state of mind on the general situation, reporting that there was crookedness everywhere, that he had had to take to task some of his own officers, and adding: "Among the officials many have no regard for me. In future it is possible that nothing can be accomplished; it is simply to bring contempt on the one who bears office for the Emperor and leave only loss of self-respect and hatred. How can you hate men? If you do hate them how can there be any advantage? In general, confusion in the world must first arise through not clearly discriminating between truth and falsehood, not distinguishing white from black. My brothers must have an ardent desire to be firm in distinguishing. But the more they do distinguish, the more will it tend to reveal chaos, and they will have to quiet their spirits to the limit. I hope that my brothers will learn to be peaceful, and learn that Pu-shan's affair is folly. This affair is henceforth not to be mentioned nor kept in mind."

But in these days of extreme mental agitation and trial, which in later years he looked back upon as a period of great moral discipline to him, there was no thought of going home. On the contrary, he set about with stout heart to repair his boats and make changes in his regulations. His defeat at Siangyin was more or less accidental and inevitable, but at Yochow he considered that he had made four prime errors. (1) His army did not rise early enough. Henceforth they were to be up and through with breakfast before dawn. (2) His camps were too vulnerable and must in future be built more strongly, with high,