Page:Tragical history of Jane Arnold (2).pdf/24



A few days since, a grand jury in the far west, ignored a bill against a huge negro for stealing chickens, and beforobefore [sic] discharging him from custody, the judge bade him stand reprimanded; he conconcluded as follows:-"You may go now, John; but (shaking his finger at him,) let me warn you never to appear here again." John, with delight beaming from his big white eyes, and a broad grin, displaying a new row of beautiful ivory replied,-"I wouldn't bin dis time, judge, only de constable fotch me!"

"What studies do you intend to pursue?" said an eruditoerudite [sic] pedagogue one day, as a Johnny-raw entered his school-room. "Why, I shall study read, I suppose, wouldn't ye?" "Yes; but you will not want to read all the time; are you well acquainted with figures?"-"It's a pity if I ain't, when I cyphered clean through adoption."-"Adoption! what rule is that?"-"Why, it's the double rulorule [sic] of two; you know that twice two is four; and, according to adoption, twice four is two!"-"You may take your seat, sir," said the schoolmaster. "You may takotake [sic] your'n too," said the pupil; "for it's a poor rule that won't work both ways."