Page:Through the torii (IA throughtorii00noguiala).pdf/207

 the Chinese ink turns to ashen gray under the same condition. That is because they have denied the protection of Solitude and betrayed it. Oh, the great blessing of Solitude be upon me; let me rise and fall, live and die with it. I am a singer of silence, the ever-blossoming beauty of Solitude.

I think it is the most true way (let me say the most heroic way) to go through the pain of ugliness when you want to see and feel the real beauty. To see the world as it is and love it is common enough. Let me see the world first as it is not and hate it with the possible great hatred. And when! grow to see the world afterward as it is and feel to love it, it is the time when I am turning natural and true. To fall means to rise, or falling is just the beginning of rising.

I often thought before that the great enemy was doubt, but now I should like to say that to truly doubt is to truly believe. (So the enemy was my real friend.) And I should say that doubt is more human and far more living Rh