Page:The woman in battle .djvu/330

294 It really appeared to be more trouble than it was worth to endeavor to persuade any of the general officers to assign me to the particular kind of duty I desired ; and, as I had been decidedly successful in more than one expedition, planned and executed by myself, and on my own responsibility, I resolved to undertake another one, just for the sake of keeping myself busy, and of seeing what would come of it. I felt very confident that if I could make a big hit, my services as a spy would be in heavy demand, for there was evidently going to be some close fighting, and the movements of the enemy would need watching at every point.

My Washington trip, just after the battle of Ball's Bluff, suggested a general method of procedure ; but in a great number of ways the present situation was a far more difficult and dangerous one, and would require the exercise of all the wits I had wits that had been tolerably well sharpened by over two years of severe experience, both as a soldier and as a spy. I was even more reckless now than I was then, but my recklessness was that of a veteran, who scorns danger when there is a necessity for braving it, but who does not expose himself any more than there is occasion for, or run himself against rifle bullets just for the fun of the thing. While well aware of the risks I incurred, however, I had an unlimited faith in my own tact and skill, and did not doubt my ability to accomplish my proposed adventure in safety, and with satisfactory results. My idea now was to run through the lines, and take a good view of the situation from the Federal standpoint, and I knew that the safest and best way of doing this if, indeed, not the only one was to go as a woman ; for, in the proper attire of my sex it would be easier for me to pass the pickets, and avoid being suspected of having any end in view to which objection could be taken. The only difficulty in the way of accomplishing my object was in procuring suitable clothing without attracting attention. As there were a number of houses in the vicinity from which the people had fled, some of them in great haste, when they found themselves likely to be in the midst of contending armies, it occurred to me that in all probability I would be able to find what I wanted in some one of them.