Page:The whole familiar colloquies of Desiderius Erasmus of Rotterdam.djvu/315

CHARON. 311 them to peace. And men's minds are variable, for I have heard that among the living there is one Polygraphns who is continually, by his writing, inveighing against wars, and exhorting to peace. Al. Ay, ay, but he has a long time been talking to the deaf. He once wrote a sort of hue and cry after peace, that was banished or driven away ; and after that an epitaph upon peace defunct. But then, on the other hand, there are others that advance our cause no less than the Furies do themselves. Ch. Who are they ? Al. They are a certain sort of animals in black and white vest- ments, ash-coloured coats, and various other dresses, that are always hovering about the courts of princes, and are continually instilling into their ears the love of war, and exhorting the nobility and common people to it, haranguing them in their sermons, that it is a just, holy, and religious war. And that which would make you stand in admira- tion at the confidence of these men is the cry of both parties. In France they preach it up that God is on the French side, and they can never be overcome that have God for their protector. In England and Spain the cry is, The war is not the king's, but God's ; therefore, if they do but fight like men, they depend upon getting the victory, and if any one should chance to fall in the battle, he will not die, but fly directly up into heaven, arms and all. Ch. And is credit given to all this ? Al. What cannot a well dissembled religion do, when to this there is added youth, inexperiencedness, ambition, a natui'al animosity, and a mind propense to anything that offers itself. It is an easy matter to impose xipon such ; it is an easy matter to overthrow a waggon that was inclining to fall before. Ch. I would do these animals a good turn with all my heart. Al. Prepare a good treat, you can do nothing that will be more acceptable to them. Ch. What, of mallows, and lupines, and leeks, for you know we have no other provision in our territories. Al. N"o, but of partridges, and capons, and pheasants, if you would have them look upon you as a good caterer. Ch. But what is it that moves these people to be so hot for war] What will they get by it? AL Because they get more by those that die than those that live. There are last wills and testaments, funeral obsequies, bulls, and a great many other articles of no despicable profit ; and in the last place, they had rather live in a camp than in their cells. War breeds a great many bishops, who were not thought good for anything in a time of peace. Ch. Well, they understand their business. Al. But what occasion have you for a new boat? Ch. None at all, if I had a mind to be wrecked again on the Stygian lake. Al. How came that about 1 ? because you had too large a company? Ch. Yes. Al. But you carry shadows, not bodies. Ch. Let them be water spiders, yet there may be enough of them to overload a boat; and then you know my boat is but a shadowy boat neither. Al- But I remember once upon a time, when you had a great company, so many that yoiir boat would not hold them, I have seen three thousand hanging upon your stem, and you were not sensible of any weight at all. Ch. I confess there are such sorts of ghosts ; those are such as pass slowly out of the body, being reduced to little or nothing with con- sumptions and hectic fevers. But as for those that are torn of a sudden out of gross bodies, they bring a great deal of corpulent sub-