Page:The whole familiar colloquies of Desiderius Erasmus of Rotterdam.djvu/225

 THE FABULOUS BANQUET. 221 go to him, and make him a present of some rare turnips. Conon at first would not hear of it, saying he should lose his labour, for that princes took no notice of such small matters; but his wife over- persuaded him. Conon picks out a parcel of choice turnips, and gets ready for his journey; but growing hungry by the way, eats them all up but one very large one. When Conon had got admission into the hall that the king was to pass through, the king knew him presently, and sent for him; and he with a great deal of cheerfulness offers his pre- sent, and the king with as much readiness of mind receives it, com- manding one that stood near him to lay it up very carefully among his greatest rarities. He commands Conon to dine with him, and after dinner thanks him; and Conon being desirous to go back into his own country, the king orders him 1,000 crowns for his turnip. When the report of this thing, as it is common, was spread abroad through the king's household servants, one of the courtiers presents the king with a very fine horse. The king knowing that it was his liberality to Conon that had put him upon this, he hoping to make a great advantage by it, he accepted it with a great deal of pleasure, and calling a council of his nobles, began to debate with what present he should make a recompence for so fine and valuable a horse. In the meantime the giver of the horse began to be flushed with expectation, thinking thus with himself, If he made such a recompence for a poor turnip offered him by a country farmer, how much more magnificently will he requite the present of so fine a horse by a courtier 1 When one answered one thing, and another another to the king that was consult- ing about it as a matter of great moment, and the designing courtier had been for a long time kept in fools' paradise, at length, says the king, It is just now come into my mind what return to make him, and calling one of his noblemen to him, whispers him in the ear, bids him go fetch him what he found in his bedchamber (telling him the place where it lay) choicely wrapped up in silk; the turnip is brought, and the king with his own hand gives it the courtier, wrapped up as it was, saying that he thought he had richly requited the present of the horse by so choice a rarity as had cost him 1,000 crowns. The courtier going away and taking off the covering, did not find a coal instead of a treasure, according to the old proverb, but a dry turnip ; and so the biter was bitten, and soundly laughed at by everybody into the bargain. As. But, Mr. King, if you will please to permit me, who am but a peasant, to speak of regal matters, I will tell you something that comes into my mind, by hearing your story concerning the same Louis ; for as one link of a chain draws on another, so one story draws on another. A certain servant seeing a louse crawling upon the king's coat, falling upon his knees and lifting up his hand, gives notice that he had a mind to do some sort of service. Louis offering himself to him, he takes off the louse and threw it away privately; the king asks him what it was; he seemed ashamed to tell him, but the king urging him, he confessed it was a louse. That is a very good sign, says he, for it shews me to be a man, because this sort of vermin particularly haunts mankind, especially while they are young, and ordered him a pi-esent of forty crowns for his good service. Some time after, another person (who had seen how well he came