Page:The whole familiar colloquies of Desiderius Erasmus of Rotterdam.djvu/223

 THE FABULOUS BANQUET. 219 Po. That was attempted afterwards, but now the magistrates knew Maccus. Ge. What did Maccus say for himself 1 Po. Do you ask what he said for himself in so good a cause as this 1 The plaintiff was in more danger than the defendant. Ge. How so 1 Po. Because he arrested him in an action of defamation, and prosecuted him upon the statute of Eheims, which says, that he that charges a man with what he cannot prove shall suffer the penalty which the defendant was to suffer if he had been convicted. He denied that he had meddled with another man's goods without his leave, but that he put them upon him, and that there was no mention made of anything of a price ; but that he challenged the shoemaker to run for a wager, and that he accepted the challenge, and that he had no reason to complain because he had outrun him. Ge. This action was pretty much like that of the shadow of the ass. "Well, but what then 1 ? Po. When they had had laughing enough at the matter, one of the judges invites Maccus to supper, and paid the shoemaker his money. Just such another thing happened a daventer when I was a boy. It was at a time when it is the fishmonger's fair and the butchers' time to be starved. A certain man stood at a fruiterer's stall, or oporo- polist's, if you would have it in Greek. The woman was a very fat woman, and he stared very hard upon the ware she had to sell. She, according as the custom is, invites him to have what he had a mind to; and perceiving he set his eyes upon some figs, Would you please to have figs ] says she, they are very fine ones. He gives her a nod. She asks him how many pounds; Would you have five pounds, says she 1 He nods again; she turns him five pounds into his apron. While she is laying by her scales, he walks off, not in any great haste, but very gravely. When she comes out to take her money her chap was gone; she follows him, making more noise than haste after him. He, taking no notice, goes on ; at last a great many getting together at the woman's outcry, he stands still, pleads his cause in the midst of the multitude : there was very good sport ; he denies that he bought any figs of her, but that she gave them him freely; if she had a mind to have a trial for it, he would put in an appearance. Ge. Well, I will tell you a story not much unlike yours, nor perhaps not much inferior to it, saving it has not so celebrated an author as Maccus. Pythagoras divided the market into, three sorts of persons those that went thither to sell, those that went thither to buy; both these sorts were a careful sort of people, and therefore unhappy : others came to see what was there to be sold, and what was done; these only were the happy people, because being free from care, they took their pleasure freely. And this, he said, was the manner that a philosopher conversed in this world, as they do in a market. But there is a fourth kind of persons that walk about in our markets, who neither buy nor sell, nor are idle spectators of what others do, but lie upon the catch to steal what they can ; and of this last sort there are some that are wonderful dexterous. You would swear they were born under a lucky planet. Our entertainer gave us a tale with an epilogue; I will give you one with a prologue to it. Now you shall hear what happened lately at Antwerp. An old priest had received there a pretty handsome sum of money, but it was in silver. A sharper has his eye upon him; he goes to the