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 of his parents, about the time he wore his H. M. S. Indomitable.

Five hundred handbills were in the parcel, printed by the Brighthelmstone Steam Printing Company, Ltd. Mary seized eagerly the one that was solemnly presented to her by W. W., while Toddles, more demonstrative than he, grinned effusively from ear to ear.

Mary read the following:

GRAND FOOTBALL MATCH FOR THE BENEFIT OF THE WIDOW AND FIVE CHILDREN OF THE LATE JOE McPHERSON.

The Olympians v Brighton and Hove Albion.

The Honorable Philip Shelmerdine has arrived in Brighton, and will positively reappear at inside right this afternoon at 3:15.

"I think that will about fix it, Mrs. Shel," said W. W. proudly. "We'll have these distributed all over the place; and we've got some bigger ones, too, to go on the hoardings."

But Philip, who at that moment was taking his fox terrier for a short constitutional, had seen the hoardings already. Thus, when he came in about five minutes later, bloodshed nearly ensued. A feeble jest, undoubtedly, but one of the penalties of athletic greatness.