Page:The Works of the Rev. Jonathan Swift, Volume 9.djvu/236

226 a crazed head, or a profligate contempt of guilt and shame.

I am therefore sorry for that other miserable creature Traulus; who, although of somewhat a different species, yet seems very far to outdo even the genius of Pistorides, in that miscarrying talent of railing without consistency, or discretion, against the most innocent persons, according to the present situation of his gall and spleen. I do not blame an honest gentleman, for the bitterest invectives against one, to whom he professes the greatest friendship, provided he acts in the dark so as not to be discovered: but in the midst of caresses, visits, and invitations, to run into the streets, or to as publick a place, and without the least pretended incitement, sputter out the basest and falsest accusations, then to wipe his mouth, come up smiling to his friend, shake him by the hand, and tell him in a whisper it was all for his service: this proceeding I am bold to think a great failure in prudence: and I am afraid lest such a practitioner, with a body so open, so foul, and so full of sores, may fall under the resentment of an incensed political surgeon, who is not in much renown for his mercy, upon great provocations: who, without waiting for his death, will flay and dissect him alive; and to the view of mankind lay open all the disordered cells of his brain, the venom of his tongue, the corruption of his heart, and spots and flatuses of his spleen: and all this for threepence.

In such a case what a scene would be laid open! and, to drop my metaphor, what a character of our mistaking friend might an angry enemy draw and expose!