Page:The Works of the Rev. Jonathan Swift, Volume 8.djvu/426

 every man talked in his own calling; ex. gr. Major swears, he was present at the seizing of a pick-pocket by a great rabble in Smithfield; and that he heard

A Tailor say, "Send the dog to Hell." The Cook, "Let me be at him, I'll baste him." The Joiner, "It is plain the dog was caught in the fact; I saw him." The Blacksmith, "He is a fine spark indeed!" The Butcher, "Knock down the shambling cur." The Glazier, "Make the light shine through him." The Bookseller, "Bind him over." The Sadler, "Pummel him." The Farmer, "Thrash the dog." A Popish Priest going by, "I'll make the Devil fly out of him."

R. 28. The Brazen-head Rule is when a Punster stands his ground against a whole company, though there is not one to side with him, to the utter destruction of all conversation but his own. As for instance — says one, "I hate a pun." — Then he, "When a pun is meant, is it a punishment?" — "Deuce take your quibbling!" — "Sir, I will not bate you an ace; cinque me if I do, and I'll make you know that I am a sice above you." — "This fellow cannot talk out of his element." — "To divert you, was all I meant."

R. 29. The Hypothetick Rule is, when you suppose things hardly consistent to be united for the sake