Page:The Works of the Rev. Jonathan Swift, Volume 8.djvu/423

Rh shall pun with you for a pistole, if I do not lose my aim, &c."

R. 19. The Rule of Challenge. As for instance, when you have conned over in your mind a chain of puns, you surprise the best punner in company, after this manner: "Say Tan-pit, if you dare."

R. 20. The Sanguine Rule allows you to swear a man out of his pun, and prove yourself the author of it, as Dr. served captain, who was told how a slater, working at his house, fell through all the rafters from top to bottom, and that upon this accident he said, "He loved to see a man go cleverly through his work." — "That is mine, by —," said the doctor.

R. 21. The Rule of Concatenation is making a string of puns as fast as you can, that nobody else can put in a word till you have exhausted the subject; ex. gr. There was one John Appleby, a gardener, fell in love with one Mrs. Curran, for her cherry cheeks and her lily white hand; and soon after he got her consent to graft upon her stock. Mr. Link the parson was sent for, who joined the loving pair together. Mr. Rowintree and Mr. Holyoak were bride-men. The company were, my lady Joan Keel, who came-a-mile a foot to compliment them; and her maid Sally, remarkable for her carrots, that rid upon a chestnut. There was Dr. Burrage too, a constant medlar in other people's affairs. He was lately im-peach'd for murdering Don Quick-set. Mrs. Lettice Skirret and Mrs. Rose-merry were the bride-maids; the latter sang a song to oblige the company, which an arch wag called a funeral dirge: but, notwithstanding this, our