Page:The Works of the Rev. Jonathan Swift, Volume 8.djvu/349

Rh ''Ld. Smart''. [He cuts it up, and tastes the venison.] 'Sbuds, this venison is musty.

''Ld. Smart''. What's the matter, Tom? you have tears in your eyes, I think: what dost cry for, man?

Neverout. My lord, I was just thinking of my poor grandmother! she died just this very day seven years.

Neverout. And pray, miss, why do you cry too?

Miss. Because you were not hang'd the day your grandmother died.

''Ld. Smart''. I'd have given forty pounds, miss, to have said that.

Col. Egad, I think the more I eat, the hungrier I am.

''Ld. Sparkish''. Why, colonel, they say, one shoulder of mutton drives down another.

Neverout. Egad, if I were to fast for my life, I would take a good breakfast in the morning, a good dinner at noon, and a good supper at night.

''Ld. Sparkish''. My lord, this venison is plaguily pepper'd; your cook has a heavy hand.

''Ld. Smart''. My lord, I hope you are pepper-proof: come, here's a health to the founders.

Lady Smart. Ay; and to the confounders too.

''Ld. Smart''. Lady Answerall, does not your ladyship love venison?

Lady Answ. No, my lord, I can't endure it in my sight; therefore please to send me a good piece of meat and crust. Rh