Page:The Works of the Rev. Jonathan Swift, Volume 8.djvu/340

330 Neverout. No, faith, miss; three meals a day, and a good supper at night, will serve my turn.

Miss. To say the truth, I'm hungry.

Neverout. And I'm angry; so let us both go fight.

Lady Smart. Ladies and gentlemen, will you eat any oysters before dinner?

Col. With all my heart. [takes an oyster.] He was a bold man that first eat an oyster.

Lady Smart. They say, oysters are a cruel meat, because we eat them alive: then they are an uncharitable meat, for we leave nothing to the poor; and they are an ungodly meat, because we never say grace.

Neverout. Faith, that's as well said as, if I had said it myself.

Lady Smart. Well, we are well set if we be but as well serv'd: come, colonel, handle your arms; shall I help you to some beef?

Col. If your ladyship please; and, pray, don't cut like a mother-in-law, but send me a large slice: for I love to lay a good foundation. I vow, 'tis a noble sirloin.

Neverout. Ay; here's cut and come again.

Miss. But pray, why is it call'd a sirloin?

''Ld. Smart''. Why you must know, that our king James the first, who lov'd good eating, being invited to dinner by one of his nobles, and seeing a large loin of beef at his table, he drew out his sword, and in a frolick knighted it. Few people know the secret of this. Lady