Page:The Works of the Rev. Jonathan Swift, Volume 3.djvu/22

14 hour of differing from himself, and swearing to both sides of a contradiction, as he finds the persons disposed with whom he has to deal. In describing the virtues and vices of mankind, it is convenient, upon every article, to have some eminent person in our eye, from whom we copy our description. I have strictly observed this rule; and my imagination this minute represents before me a certain great man famous for this talent, to the constant practice of which, he owes his twenty years reputation of the most skilful head in England, for the management of nice affairs. The superiority of his genius consists in nothing else, but an inexhaustible fund of political lies, which he plentifully distributes every minute he speaks, and by an unparalleled generosity forgets, and consequently contradicts, the next half hour. He never yet considered, whether any proposition were true or false, but whether it were convenient for the present minute or company, to affirm or deny it; so that if you think fit to refine upon him, by interpreting every thing he says, as we do dreams, by the contrary, you are still to seek, and will find yourself equally deceived whether you believe or not: the only remedy is to suppose, that you have heard some inarticulate sounds, without any meaning at all; and besides, that will take off the horrour you might be apt to conceive at the oaths, wherewith he perpetually tags both ends of every proposition; although at the same time, I think, he cannot with any justice be taxed with perjury, when he invokes God and Christ; because he has often fairly given public notice to the world, that he believes in neither. Some