Page:The Works of the Rev. Jonathan Swift, Volume 18.djvu/209

Rh and the publick peace, and the present posture of affairs. All that love their country, and right good Florence, will perceive by this on which side of the argument they ought to appear.

And now, for the universal peace of mankind, I make the following rule, to be observed by all professors in each faculty, and their understrappers: I decree, that a doctor of physick shall take place of a doctor of laws; a surgeon, of an advocate; an apothecary, of a proctor of office; and a toothdrawer, of a register in the court. I intended this for a parallel; but here it fails me, and the lines meet.

I shall now only observe farther, that as the case seems desperate on the side of civilians in point of reason, so I hear they have another game to play, and are for appealing to authority; as I have known a schoolboy, fairly beaten at cuffs, run with a bloody nose to complain to his master. I am credibly informed, there is a design on foot to bring in heads of a bill in favour of civilians, next session of parliament; but how generous that sort of proceeding is, I leave the world to judge. I am but one; and will certainly oppose any such motion in my place; though, from the number of civilians in the house, I have reason to apprehend, it will be to little purpose. The college, a true alma mater, has dubbed most of us doctors, and has been more wise than christian in her favours of that kind; for she has not given, hoping for nothing again.

But here I enter my protest against all designs that may any way prejudice so great and illustrious a body Rh