Page:The Works of the Rev. Jonathan Swift, Volume 17.djvu/185

Rh trow. Look ye, gentlemen, I have lived with credit in the world, and it grieves my heart, never to stir out of my doors, but to be pulled by the sleeve by some rascally dun or other: "Sir, remember my bill: there's a small concern of a thousand pounds, I hope you think on't, sir." And to have these usurers transact my debts at coffeehouses, and alehouses, as if I were going to break up shop. Lord! that ever the rich, the generous John Bull, clothier, the envy of all his neighbours, should be brought to compound his debts for five shillings in the pound: and to have his name in an advertisement for a statute of bankrupt. The thought of it makes me mad. I have read somewhere in the Apocrypha, that one should "not consult with a woman, touching her of whom she is jealous; nor with a merchant, concerning exchange; nor with a buyer, of selling; nor with an unmerciful man of kindness, &c." I could have added one thing more, "nor with an attorney, about compounding a lawsuit." The ejectment of lord Strutt will never do. The evidence is crimp; the witnesses swear backward and forward, and contradict themselves; and his tenants stick by him. One tells me, that I must carry on my suit, because Lewis is poor; another, because he is still too rich: whom shall I believe? I am sure of one thing, that a penny in the purse is the best friend John can have at last; and who can say that this will be the last suit I shall be engaged in? Besides, if this ejectment were practicable, is it reasonable, that when esquire South is losing his money to sharpers and pickpockets, going about the country with fiddlers and buffoons, and squandering his income with hawks and dogs, I should lay out the fruits of my Rh