Page:The Works of the Rev. Jonathan Swift, Volume 1.djvu/450

 I, to think there could be such a thing as a spoiled child who had not learned French."

In the pursuit of the bagatelle, he often descended to puerilities. Passing some time in the country, where Dan Jackson was one of the company (he whose long nose furnished a subject for several humorous copies of verses to be found in Vol. VII. p. 215 and fol.) Swift used to try many practical jokes on him. One day he pretended to lay hold of a creeper on Dan's neck, and put himself in the posture of cracking it on the table with his thumb nail, at the same time making a noise similar to it with the joint of his finger; a common schoolboy's trick. He had served him in this manner more than once, when Dan resolved to be prepared for him if he ever attempted it again. With this view he procured a louse of the largest size he could get, and stopping it up in a quill, kept it in his pocket. It was not long before Swift repeated the trick; when Dan Jackson took an opportunity, while the dean was looking another way, of unstopping the quill, and dropping the louse just before him, calling out Mr. dean — Mr. dean — you have missed killing it this time, there it is crawling just before you. This turned the laugh against Swift, and put an end to that and some other of his pranks, as he found Dan was not so patient a butt as he had taken him for, and knew how to retaliate with advantage.

Among other jeux d'esprit, he was fond of punning, and used to say that none disliked it but those who could not make one. The old lord Pembroke was a remarkable punster, and when lord lieutenant of Ireland, delighted much in Swift's company on that account. One day being at the castle