Page:The Works Of Henry Fielding (1903, NY) Vol. 12 - Miscellaneous Writings, Part 2.pdf/293

 good friends, Mr. Boots, I tell you plainly that, if you plague me so damnably as you did yesterday morning, by G–– I'll commit you to the flames; stap my vituals! as my lord Huntingdon says in the play." He then looked full in my face, and asked the landlord if he had ever been at Drury-lane playhouse; which he answered in the negative. "What!" says he, "did you never hear talk of Mr. Garrick and king Richard?" "No, sir," says the landlord. "By G––," says the gentleman, "he is the cleverest fellow in England." He then spouted a speech out of King Richard, which begins, "Give me an horse," &c. "There," says he, "that, that is just like Mr. Garrick." Having pleased himself vastly with this performance, he shook the landlord by the hand with great good-humour, and said, "By G–– you seem to be an honest fellow, and good blood; if you'll come and see me in London, I'll give you your skinful of wine, and treat you with a play and a whore every night you stay. I'll show you how it is to live, my boy. But here, bring me some paper, my girl; come, let us have one of your love-letters to air my boots." Upon which the landlord presented him with a piece of an old newspaper. "D––n you!" says the gent, "this is not half enough; have you never a Bible or Common Prayerbook in the house? Half a dozen chapters of Genesis, with a few prayers, make an excellent fire in a pair of boots." "Oh! Lord forgive you!" says the landlord "sure you would not burn such books as those?" "No!" cries the spark; "where was you born? Go into a shop of London and buy