Page:The Strand Magazine (Volume 2).djvu/528

 fare out of own pocket, and a policeman was told off to get his railway ticket. "But if ever you come before me again—"

Mr. Williams claims Freshford, in Somersetshire, as the place of his birth, and the date thereof the 30th September, 1835. He comes of a thoroughly legal stock. He went to Eton when he was about twelve, and among his schoolfellows was Mr. F. C. Burnand. Then in a merry mood the magistrate recalls some very happy doings there.

"When I first went to Eton," he said, "I was extremely small. Whether my fellow scholars took advantage of my size or not, I cannot say, but they certainly took advantage of my hat. For some reason or other there was a kind of passion amongst the bigger boys to turn my hat into a football. No sooner had I got a new one on than it was spotted; it was off in a minute and away it went. I can assure you I have walked about the play-fields there, with my hands in my pockets, with a hat on my head—the remains of a brim and ventilated with innumerable holes—such as a tramp would despise. Whenever one wanted a new hat, you had to go to your tutor, and get an order on Devereux's. I got through scores, until at last my tutor got so sick of writing me orders, that he flatly refused to give me any more, and I am perfectly serious when I tell you that I went about Eton hatless!

"I once ventured to write my name on the time-honoured walls. The late Provost there was then master of the lower division, fifth form. Now, he had a nasty knack of pretending to be asleep, and, suddenly waking up, would catch some poor pupil doing such things as should be left undone. One day we were assembled in his little room, just off the swishing room, where Hawtrey used to administer the instrument of torture. Ah! and he had a strong arm, too. I