Page:The Relations Tolstoy.pdf/86

 ornate dresses. It really is pleasanter to sew one's shirt (and for one's soul how much more profitable) than to spend an evening at the game of "secretaire" even with the wittiest people. But above all the idea current in society, that it is humiliating for a girl not to get married, to remain a spinster, -this is as completely opposed to the truth, as are all worldly judgments on vital questions. A life kept celibate because good works of higher standards than marriage fill it such as all acts of love towards one's neighbors, the cup of water, etc. -is infinitely superior to any married life. "All men cannot receive this saying, but they to whom it is given." (Matt. xix. 11.) And so the question has been regarded by men and women of all nations and all ages, who have shown the greatest respect and sympathy to celibates of both sexes, celibate not because they were obliged to be celibate, but for God's sake. Whereas in our society they are regarded as most ridiculous people. It is just the same with people who are poor for God's sake: those who do not seek to become wealthy. I advise every girl, and you too, to place your ideal in the service of God; that is in the keeping and rearing in oneself of the divine spark, and therefore remaining celibate if marriage hinders this service. But if it so happened that having yielded to the personal feelings towards one man you were to marry, then mother, as in generally the case, but without losing consideration to the chief object of life -the service of God, -to endeavor with all your might that your exclusive and egoistic attachment to your family does not hinder the service of God.

... All young men of your age in your conditions are in a position of great danger. At an age when habits are formed which will remain forever, like creases in paper, you live with no moral or religious restraints, knowing nothing beyond the tediousness of the enforced