Page:The Relations Tolstoy.pdf/64

 is supposed to have been said by God, but because it is the confirmation of an unquestionable truth that the union of two beings having as a result the birth of a child, unites these beings in some mysterious way different from all other unions, so that two in a certain respect cease to be two, and become one. And therefore, I think that this conjoint being (i.e., both of the two, together) can and should strive towards abstinence: towards the cessation of such relations; and the one who in this respect is more advanced, should endeavor to influence the other by all the means he or she commands: by simplicity of life, example, persuasion. But until both have united in the same desire they should bear together the weight of the sins of their conjoint being. Owing to our passions we often commit deeds abhorrent to our best selves, contrary to our conscience; so in this case we have to commit deeds abhorrent to our individual conscience if we regard ourselves not as separate beings, but as a part of the conjoint being of a married couple. The point is only that as with one's individual temptations, so also in this temptation of the conjoint being, one should not for one minute regard sin as not sin, -one should not cease to struggle. You are right in saying that there are duties towards oneself as an image and likeness of God, and that man cannot and should not permit the profanation of his body; but this does not refer to those conjugal relations from which there have been or may be children. Childbirth, and the rearing and feeding of children, abolishes the greater part of the weight and wrongfulness of these relations, and besides, for the long periods of pregnancy and feeding, liberates from them.