Page:The Posthumous Papers of the Pickwick Club.djvu/634

532 ^32 POSTHUMOUS PAPERS OF

know — that, and leaving the business to take care of itself, as it seems to have made up its mind not to take care of me." With this explana- tion of the phenomenon of the shutters, Mr. Bob Sawyer pointed to the shop, and relapsed into an ecstacy of mirth.

" Bless me, you are surely not mad enough to think of leaving your patients without anybody to attend them !" remonstrated Mr. Pickwick in a very serious tone.

None of them ever pay. Besides," said Bob, lowering his voice to a confidential whisper, " they will be all the better for it, for being nearly out of drugs and not able to increase my account just now, I should have been obliged to give them calomel all round, and it would have been certain to have disagreed with some of them — so it's all for the best."
 * ' Why not?" asked Bob, in reply. " I shall save by it, you know.

There was a philosophy and a strength of reasoning about this reply, which Mr. Pickwick was not prepared for. He paused a few moments, and added, less firmly than before —

" But this chaise, my young friend — this chaise will only hold two; and I am pledged to Mr. Allen."

all ; Sam and I will share the dickey between us. Look here. This little bill is to be wafered on the shop-door : * Sawyer, late Nockemorf. Enquire of Mrs. Cripps over the way.' — Mrs. Cripps is my boy's mother. — * Mr. Sawyer's very sorry,' says Mrs. Cripps, ' couldn't help it — fetched away early this morning to a consultation of the very first surgeons in the country — couldn't do without him — would have him at any price — tremendous operation.' The fact is," said Bob, in con- clusion — "■ It'll do me more good than otherwise, I expect. If it gets into one of the local papers* it will be the making of me. Here's Ben — now then, jump in."
 * Don't think of me for a minute," replied Bob. " I've arranged it

W^ith these hurried words, Mr. Bob Sawyer pushed the postboy on one side, jerked his friend into the vehicle, slammed the door, put up the steps, wafered the bill on the street-door, locked it, put the key in his pocket, jumped into the dickey, gave the word for starting; and did the whole with such extraordinary precipitation, that before Mr. Pickwick had well begun to consider whether Mr. Bob Sawyer ought to go or not, they were rolling away with Mr. Bob Sawyer, thoroughly established as part and parcel of the equipage.

So long as their progress was confined to the streets of Bristol, the facetious Bob kept his professional green spectacles on, and conducted himself with becoming steadiness and gravity of demeanour, merely giving utterance to divers verbal witticisms for the exclusive behoof and entertainment of Mr. Samuel Weller, but when they emerged upon the open road, he threw oflf his green spectacles and his gravity together, and performed a great variety of practical jokes, which were rather calculated perhaps to attract the attention of the passers-by, and to render the carriage and those it contained, objects of more than ordinary curiosity; the least conspicuous among these feats being a most vociferous imitation of a key- bugle, and the ostentatious display of a crimson silk pocket-handkerchief attached to a walking-stick, which