Page:The Posthumous Papers of the Pickwick Club.djvu/442

360 iJ60 POSTHUMOUS PAPERS OF

subjected a chaise-cart to the process in question on that identical morn- iug, the learned sergeant considered it advisable to underg-o a slight re*- lapse into the dismals before he concluded.

" But enough of this, gentlemen," said Mr. Sergeant Buzfuz, '< it is difficult to smile with an aching- heart ; it is ill jesting when our deepest sympathies are awakened. My client's hopes and prospects are ruined, and it is no figure of speech to say that her occupation is gone indeed. The bill is down — but there is no tenant. Eligible single gentlemen pass and repass — but there is no invitation for them to enquire within, or without. All is gloom and silence in the house ; even the voice of the child is hushed ; his infant sports are disregarded when his mother weeps ; his ' alley tors ' and his ' commoneys ' are alike neglected ; he forgets the long familiar cry of ' knuckle down,' and at tip-cheese, or odd and even, his hand is out. But Pickwick, gentlemen, Pickwick, the ruthless destroyer of this domestic oasis in the desert of Goswell-street — Pickwick, who has choaked up the well, and thrown ashes on the sward — Pickwick, who comes before you to- day with his heartless tomata sauce and warming pans — Pickwick still rears his head with unblushing effrontery, and gazes without a sigh on the ruin he has made. Damages, gentlemen — heavy damages is the only punishment with which you can visit him ; the only recom- pence you can award to my client. And for those damages she now appeals to an enlightened, a high-minded, a right-feeling, a conscientious, a dispassionate, a sympathising, a contemplative jury of her civilized countrymen." With this beautiful peroration, Mr. Serjeant Buzfuz sat down, and Mr. Justice Stareleigh woke up.

" Call Elizabeth Cluppins," said Sergeant Buzfuz, rising a minute afterwards, with renewed vigour.

The nearest usher called for Elizabeth Tuppins ; another one, at a little distance off, demanded Elizabeth Jupkins ; and a third rushed in a breathless state into King-street, and screamed for Ehzabeth Muffins till he was hoarse. *

Meanwhile Mrs. Cluppins, with the combined assistance of Mrs. Bardell, Mrs. Sanders, Mr. Dodson, and Mr. Fogg, was hoisted into the witness-box ; and when she was safely perched on the top step, Mrs. Bardell stood on the bottom one, with the pocket-handkerchief and pattens in one hand, and a glass bottle that might hold about a quarter of a pint of smelling salts in the other, ready for any emergency. Mrs. Sanders, whose eyes were intently fixed on the judge's face, planted herself close by, with the large umbrella: keeping her right thumb pressed on the spring with an earnest countenance, as if she were fully prepared to put it up at a moment's notice.

" Mrs. Cluppins," said Sergeant Buzfuz, " pray compose yourself, ma'am ; " and, of course, directly Mrs. Cluppins was desired to compose herself she sobbed with increased vehemence, and gave divers alarming manifestations of an approaching fainting fit, or, as she afterwards said,. of her feelings being too many for her. *

" Do you recollect, Mrs. Cluppins ? " said Sergeant Buzfuz, after a few unimportant questions — « do you recollect being in Mrs, Bardell'*