Page:The Posthumous Papers of the Pickwick Club.djvu/434

354 S54 POSTHUMOUS PAPERS OF

Mr. Justice Stareleigh (who sat in the absence of the Chief Justice, occasioned by indisposition,) was a most particularly short man, and so fat, that he seemed all face and waistcoat. He rolled in, upon two little turned legs, and having- bobbed gravely to the bar, who bobbed gravely to him, put his little legs underneath his table, and his little three- cornered hat upon it ; and when Mr. Justice Stareleigh had done this, all you could see of him was two queer little eyes, one broad pink face, and somewhere about half of a big and very comical-looking wig.

The judge had no sooner taken his seat, than the officer on the floor of the court called out " Silence ! " in a commanding tone, upon which another officer in the gallery cried " Silence ! " in an angry manner, whereupon three or four more ushers shouted '' Silence ! " in a voice of indignant remonstrance. This being done, a gentleman in black, who sat below the judge, proceeded to call over the names of the jury ; and after a great deal of bawling, it was discovered that only ten special jurymen were present. Upon this, Mr. Sergeant Buzfuz prayed a tales ; the gentleman in black then proceeded to press into the special jury two of the common jurymen ; and a green-grocer and a chemist were caught directly.

" Answer to your names, gentlemen, that you may be sworn," said the gentleman in black. " Richard Upwitch."

" Here," said the green-grocer.

" Thomas Groffin."


 * ' Here," said the chemist.

" Take the book, gentlemen. You shall well and truly try — "

" I beg this court's pardon," said the chemist, who was a tall, thin, yellow-visaged man, *' but I hope this court will excuse my attendance.*

" On what grounds, Sir?" said Mr. Justice Stareleigh.

" I have no assistant, my Lord," said the chemist.

«« I can't help that, Sir," replied Mr. Justice Stareleigh. " You should hire one."

" I can't afford it, my Lord," rejoined the chemist.

" Then you ought to be able to afford it. Sir," said the Judge, red- dening ; for Mr. Justice Stareleigh's temper bordered on the irritable, and brooked not contradiction.

" I know I ought to do, if I got on as well as I deserved, but I don't, my Lord," answered the chemist.


 * < Swear the gentleman," said the Judge, peremptorily.

The officer had got no further than the " You shall well and truly try," when he was again interrupted by the chemist.

"I am to be sworn, my Lord, am I?" said the chemist.

" Certainly, Sir," replied the testy little Judge.

'• Very well, my Lord," replied the chemist in a resigned manner. " Then there'll be murder before this trial's over ; that's all. Swear me if you please, Sir ;" and sworn the chemist was, before the Judge could find words to utter.

" I merely wanted to observe, my Lord," said the chemist, taking his seat with great deliberation, " that I've left nobody but an errand-boy in my shop. He is a very nice boy, my Lord, but he is not much ac- quainted with drugs ; and I know that the prevailing impression on his