Page:The Posthumous Papers of the Pickwick Club.djvu/123

77 THE PICKWICK CI.UB. 77

frouliled. The succeeding- Imlf-hour's conversation was not of u natuio to calm his porturbed spirit. The new visiter was very talkative, and the number of his anecdotes was only to be exceeded by the extent of his politeness. Mr. Tupman felt, that as Jingle's popularity increased, he (Tupman) retired further into the shade. His laughter was forced — his merriment feigned ; and when at last he laid his acliing temples between the sheets, he thought, with horrid delight on the satisfaction it would afford him, to have Jingle's head at that moment between the feather bed and the mattrass.

The indefatigable stranj^er rose betimes next morning, and, although his companions remained in bed overpowered with the dissipation of the previous night, exerted himself most successfully to promote the hilarity of the breakfast-table. So successful were his efforts, that even the deaf old lady insisted on having one or two of his best jokes retailed through the trumpet ; and even she condescended to observe to the spinster aunt, that '* he" (meanini,'- Jingle) " was an impudent young- fellow" — a sentiment in which all her relations then and there present thoroughly coincided.

It was the old lady's habit on the fine summer mornings to repair to the arbour in which Mr. Tupman had already signalised himself, in form and manner following : — first, the fat boy fetched from a peg- behind the old lady's bed-room door, a close black satin bonnet, a warm cotton shawl, and a thick stick with a capacious handle ; and the old lady having put on the bonnet and shawl at her leisure, would lean one hand on the stick and the other on the fat boy's shoulder, and walk leisurely to the arbour, where the fat boy would leave her to enjoy the fresh air for the space of half an hour ; at the expiration of which time he would return and reconduct her back to the house.

The old lady was very precise and very particular ; and as this cere- mony had been observed for three successive summers without the slightest deviation from the accustomed form, she was not a little sur- prised on this particular morning, to see the fat boy, instead of leaving- the arbour, walk a few paces out of it, look carefully round him in every direction, and return towards her with great stealth and an air of the most profound mystery.

The old lady was timorous — most old ladies are — and her first impres- sion was that the bloated lad was about to do her some grievous bodily harm with the view of possessing himself of her loose coin. She would hare cried for assistance, but age and infirmity had long ago deprived her of the power of screaming ; she, therefore, watched his motions with feelings of intense terror, which were in no degree diminished by his coming close up to her, and shouting in her ear in an agitated, and as it seemed to her, a threatening tone, —

"Missus!"

Now it so happened that Mr. Jingle was walking in the garden close to the arbour at this moment. He too heard the shout of '• Missus," and stopped to hear more. There were three reasons for his doing so. In the first place, he was idle and curious ; secondly, he was by no means scrupulous ; thirdly, and lastly, he was concealed from view by some flowering shrubs. So there he stood, and there he listened.