Page:The Portrait of a Lady (1882).djvu/240

232 232 THE PORTRAIT OF A LADY. poor, and I was not a man of genius. I had no talents even ; I took my measure early in life. I was simply the most fastidious young gentleman living. There were two or three people in the world I envied the Emperor of Russia, for instance, and the Sultan of Turkey ! There were even moments when I envied the Pope of Rome for the consideration he enjoys. T should have been delighted to be considered to that extent ; but since that couldn't be, I didn't care for anything less, and I made up my mind not to go in for honours. A gentleman can always consider himself, and fortunately, I was a gentleman. I could do nothing in Italy I couldn't even be an Italian patriot. To do that, I should have had to go out of the country; and I was too fond of it to leave it. So I have passed a great many years here, on that quiet plan I spoke of. I have not been at all unhappy. I don't mean to say I have cared for nothing ; but the things I have cared for have been definite limited. The events of my life have been absolutely unperceived by any one save myself ; getting an old silver crucifix at a bargain (I have never bought anything dear, of course), or discovering, as I once did, a sketch by Correggio on a panel daubed over by some inspired idiot ! " This would have been rather a dry account of Mr. Osmond's career if Isabel had fully believed it ; but her imagination sup- plied the human element which she was sure had not been wanting. His life had been mingled with other lives more than he admitted ; of course she could not expect him to enter into this. For the present she abstained from provoking further revelations ; to intimate that he had not told her everything would be more familiar and less considerate than she now desired to be. He had certainly told her quite enough. It was her present inclination, however, to express considerable sympathy for the success with which he had preserved his independence. " That's a very pleasant life," she said, " to renounce everything but Correggio ! " " Oh, I have been very happy ; don't imagine me to suggest for a moment that I have not. It's one's own fault if one is not happy." " Have you lived here always 1 " " No, not .always. 1 lived a long time at Naples, and many years in Rome. But I have been here a good while. Perhaps I shall have to change, however ; to do something else. I have no longer myself to think of. My daughter is growing up, and it is very possible she may not care so much for the Correggios and crucifixes as L I shall have to do what is best for her."