Page:The Pilgrim's Progress, the Holy War, Grace Abounding Chunk3.djvu/113

Rh also the pillory. Again, if I only provide for these, then I am not fit for banishment. Further, if I conclude that banishment is the worst, then if death comes I am surprised. So that I see the best way to go through sufferings is'to trust in God through Christ, as touching the world to come; and as touching this world, to count the grave my house, to make my bed in darkness; to say "to corruption, Thou art my father: to the worm, Thou art my mother and sister"—that is, to familiarize these things to me.

327. But notwithstanding these helps, I found myself a man encompassed with infirmities. The parting with my wife and poor children hath often been to me in this place as the pulling the ﬂesh from the bones, and that not only because I am somewhat too fond of these great mercies, but, also because I should have often brought to my mind the many hardships, miseries, and wants that my poor family was like to meet with should I be taken from them, especially my poor blind child, who lay nearer my heart than all beside. Oh, the thoughts of the hardship I thought my poor blind one might go under would break my heart to pieces!

328. Poor child, thought I, what sorrow art thou like to have for thy portion in this world! Thou must be beaten, must beg, suffer hunger, cold, nakedness, and a thousand l calamities, though I cannot now endure the wind should blow upon thee. But yet recalling myself, thought I, I must venture you all with God, though it goeth to the quick to leave you. Oh, I saw in this condition I was as a man who was pulling down his house upon the head of his wife and children! yet thought I, I must do it, I must do it. And now I thought on those two milch kine that were to carry the ark of God into another country, and to leave their calves behind them. (1 Sam. vi. 10.)

329. But that which helped me in this temptation was divers considerations, of which three in special here I will name. The first was the consideration of these two scriptures,