Page:The Philippine Islands, 1493-1803 (Volume 09).pdf/265



Sire:

With some misgiving and anxiety, Sire, I have considered whether or no I should write this to your Majesty, but necessity and not my wish obliges me. For some reasons I would like to leave it unwritten, particularly because I do not care to contradict myself and appear, in what I am about to write and ask of your Majesty, to change my ground from what I have written to your Majesty before about some of my affairs. I cease not to fear and dread that the reason of this may appear from what I write now and what has before been written, to be an invention, artifice, or plot. It is not so, although I confess it does in some wise appear so. Speaking with frankness and truth, Sire, which is the way in which I have concluded to write this, and as one should always write, particularly to your Majesty, the fact is, Sire, that my affairs have taken a different turn from what I expected when I wrote to your Majesty. By the compassion and grace of God I have no longer that wish, intent, and desire, which I have expressed in other letters to your Majesty, concerning my wish and desire of obtaining a state more quiet and safe and less disturbed, and less dangerous for my past and present