Page:The Novels of Ivan Turgenev (volume XI).djvu/345

Rh his throat. He was like his sister. The eyes especially recalled her. I liked being nice to him; and at the same time an aching sadness was gnawing at my heart. 'Now I certainly am a child,' I thought; 'but yesterday.' I remembered where I had dropped my knife the night before, and looked for it. The cadet asked me for it, picked a thick stalk of wild parsley, cut a pipe out of it, and began whistling. Othello whistled too.

But in the evening how he wept, this Othello, in Zinaïda's arms, when, seeking him out in a corner of the garden, she asked him why he was so depressed. My tears flowed with such violence that she was frightened. 'What is wrong with you? What is it, Volodya?' she repeated; and seeing I made no answer, and did not cease weeping, she was about to kiss my wet cheek. But I turned away from her, and whispered through my sobs, 'I know all. Why did you play with me? What need had you of my love?'

'I am to blame, Volodya ' said Zinaïda.

'I am very much to blame ' she added, wringing her hands. 'How much there is bad and black and sinful in me! But I am not playing with you now. I love you; you don't even suspect why and how. But what is it you know?'