Page:The Mikado or the town of titipu.djvu/18

 No. Pardon me, but there I am adamant. As official Headsman, my reputation is at stake, and I can't consent to embark on a professional operation unless I see my way to a successful result.

This professional conscientiousness is highly creditable to you, but it places us in a very awkward position.

My good sir, the awkwardness of your position is grace itself compared with that of a man engaged in the act of cutting off his own head.

I am afraid that, unless you can obtain a substitute—

A substitute? Oh, certainly— nothing easier. (To ). Pooh-Bah, I appoint you Lord High Substitute.

I should be delighted. Such an appointment would realise my fondest dreams. But no, at any sacrifice, I must set bounds to my insatiable ambition!

To sit in solemn silence in a dull, dark dock. In a pestilential prison, with a life-long lock, Awaiting the sensation of a short, sharp shock, From a cheap and chippy chopper on a big black block!

[Exeunt and