Page:The Life of Mary Baker G. Eddy.djvu/321

Rh grew so exacting that when he went out to do her errands he found it expedient to take down her instructions in writing, so that if, by the time he returned, she had changed her mind as to what she wanted done, he would have his notes to justify himself. When Mr. Howard left Mrs. Eddy's house in October, 1881, six months after he had moved into it, he had decided to leave the Church as well.

Mr. Howard was not the only Christian Scientist who came to this decision. Discouragement and discontent had been growing among Mrs. Eddy's oldest and most devout followers. For a long while they said nothing to each other, and each bore his disappointment and disillusionment as best he could. They believed firmly in the principles of Christian Science and hesitated to do anything which might injure the Church, but they felt that no good, either to her or to themselves, could come from their further association with Mrs. Eddy. Mr. Howard, when he went to explain his position to Mrs. Rice before he took the final step, found, to his amazement, that both she and her sister, Miss Rawson, felt that they had come to the end of their endurance and could follow Mrs. Eddy no further. Five others of the leading women of the Church confessed that they were discouraged and dissatisfied. They were tired of being dragged as witnesses into lawsuits which they believed were unwise, and which they knew brought discredit upon the Church and, discouraged by the outbursts of rage which Mrs. Eddy apparently made no effort to control, and which they believed helped to bring on the violent illnesses for which they were perpetually called to treat her. Above all, they were tired of Malicious Mesmerism. Several of her