Page:The Lady's Book Volume I 1830.pdf/7

Rh friends, where thou wilt be happy, and leave me to my fate."

She faintly exclaimed, " Happy, while you are wretched ! O , impossible !"

" Thou art the only object in life that is dear to me, but pause ere you take a step that indissolubly links your fate with mine. Remember, the world is a fearful world for the feeble to encounter. "

" It is too late for me to think of that now."

"What, wouldst thou leave friends, kindred, home-all for me?"

"All, all for thee."

How brilliant is the dream of youth, when the soul is first awakened by the aspirations of love. We are then as our first parents were before the fall, breathing the very atmosphere of heaven, holding communion with angels, and fearlessly approaching the Creator himself. It is, however , a feeling, that we enjoy but once, and for a moment only; it passes away like a flash of lightning that is succeeded by darkness, and no power can revive it, unless, indeed, it be revived in heaven.

From that hour she became mine. Let not those who adjudge me condemn my selfishness, unless they possess the fortitude to have acted otherwise. She was the only treasure I had ever possessed, and I viewed her as an offering from heaven, that it would have been suicide to have rejected-I could not have survived her loss.

That night we travelled towards a neighbouring city. She hung upon my arm, and spoke cheerfully, drawing a thousand bright pictures of future happiness, that it would have required a thousand lives to have realized, and we were to enjoy the whole in one-Such is the magic pencil with which young love paints ! The night was beautiful, clad in the glory of her countless stars. Even the vegetable world appeared to be endued with animal life, and to inhale the refreshing breezes. The lofty trees stood forth like the giants of the earth, and seemed as though they were slumbering in the moonlight, and so awfully calm was nature, that I almost fancied I heard their respiration. It was a calm that foretold the coming storm.

We lived in a secluded spot, obscurely and unknown. Apprehension of being discovered subsided, as days and weeks passed away, and we neither saw nor heard of any one to molest us. I obtained employment, and a new view of life burst upon me as I reflected that by my labour she was supported, who had deserted the world for me. It stimulated me to constant exertion; my mind became more cheerful, and I daily experienced how delicious that coarse bread is which is made with the sweat of the brow. What are all the heartless enjoyments of the more prosperous compared to this ! They rove from pleasure to pleasure, gathering sweets, until the luscious hoard palls upon the appetite, and then turn away nauseated, and arrogantly pronounce the choicest blessings that the Creator has bestowed, all vanity. I had but one drop of sweet mingled in my cup of bitter, it was a potent drop for it made me delirious with joy. I revelled in it, and I was thankful. Man was not made for a round of pleasure, for pleasures soon become toils, and of the most irksome kind when there is no obstacle to be surmounted, nothing to stimulate to exertion, and the mind lies inactive. This state is literally death of the better part of man, and that which is endued with vitality is nothing more thanthe sepulchre of the spirit-corruption lies within. How dare such hope for pleasure, and impiously complain when they do not attain it ?—As well might the dead hope for pleasure in the grave.

The fountain of all pure delight is a virtuous mind, and he who possesses that, with a taste to admire the wondrous works that present themselves, from the minute flower, and the insect of complicated formation, and all things that intervene between them, and the myriads of unexplored worlds, that shine forth so gloriously in the firmament, until he becomes so engrossed with admiration, that he dare, with becoming awe, approach that heaven, above all heavens of the poets ' invention-that man may bid defiance to the accumulated sorrows of this world; they may .. fall upon him, press him to the earth for a time, but they cannot crush him! Come what may, that man cannot be otherwise than happy.

So I once thought, for I studied to convince myself that it was so, and I would fain think so still, but alas ! it requires but a slight jar to destroy the harmony of the most carefully attuned instrument, and nothing but grating discord proceeds from it afterwards,

I had been blessed with the society of my wife for more than six months-as I look back to that period, it seems to have been scarcely as many days. One evening, the labour of the day being over earlier than usual, as I was returning to my home, full of joy, in crossing a public square, I again encountered the man who had recognized me before. I endeavoured to evade him, he followed, I turned into obscure streets and increased my speed, without venturing to look behind as I hurried on. The dusk of the evening was gradually increasing, and I trusted that, and the circuitous route I had pursued, would protect me from his vigilance. I did not go directly home, but wandered about until it became quite dark, for I was aware that my wife was more the object of his pursuit than myself. I had learnt since our marriage, that he was attached to her, and was to become her husband with her father's consent, and I dreaded to betray the place of her concealment.

I entered the house exhausted with fatigue and anxiety. I told my wife whom I had encountered, and the measures I had taken to evade him. She endeavoured to quiet my fears, but they increased as I perceived to what an extent her own were awakened. We spoke not long before we concluded to fly the city, and without loss of time, lest by possibility my steps might have been traced. All places were alike to us, provided we were together, for with the human race we ac-