Page:The Lady's Book Vol. IV.pdf/23

Rh My groans, groans more of mental than of physical suffering, at last alarmed some part of the family; and my landlady’s daughter tapped at the door and asked me whether I was ill? No answer being returned, she opened the door and repeated her enquiry; I replied: “Leave me alone—leave me alone—I have taken poison— leave me to die in peace.” On this, she uttered a loud scream, then rushed to the head of the stairs, and stood screaming there till the whole family, which had sat up carousing, were brought to the spot. In answer to their questions about the cause of the uproar, she only screamed, and at length, to explain the matter more clearly, went into hysterics. After the lapse of some valu- able minutes, when they had found that nothing was to be learnt from her, the master of the house, a coarse fellow, applied to me to inform him what had happened, and I told it to him pretty nearly in the same words in which I had told it to his daughter. He received the intelligence differently. - “A pretty business this here,” said he, “I would not have had such a thing to happen in the house—no, net for a thousand pounds!” And then off he went, as he said, for the doctor. I faintly told him it would be of no use—that hu- man aid would not avail; but I must confess that I felt no disposition to offer any vehement resist- ance to the experiment. My bed was now sur- rounded by the members of the family, who ceased, not to ask me how I came to do such a thing, and to admonish me of the sinfulness of the action; at the same time that they seemed full of the most tender anxiety to alleviate my bodily pains. Indeed, such was their zeal for me, that but for the good sense of a visitor, they would have made me swallow all the sallad oil which there happened to be in the cruet-stand, on the strength of its antidotical reputation, without waiting the arrival of the doctor. After the lapse of about a quarter of an hour, which seemed to me an age, the apothecary arrived, and having very sensibly commenced business by clearing the room, he asked me what poison was, the quantity, and how long I had ae I told him what it was, the quantity, that I took it ata nine; he pulled out his watch, looked at the time—half past twelve, and looked grave. “What did you take it in?’—I replied, pointing to the glass on the toilet. He walked up to it, as I thought, with strane deliberation, and un- feeling composure, and seeing the paper on the table, took it up, read the inscription, and drop- ped it with a manner which went to my heart, and made my teeth chatter in my head. I then felt, for the first time, the horror of death—I then seemed for the first time, to feel that I was indeed dying—feted in a few quick minutes to cease to be—and passing bitter was that moment of ago- ny! Still I watched the apothecary, as if my last shadow of hope rested on his uncouth person. Having laid down the paper as I have descri he immediately took up the glass—and this period, short as it was, was the period which contained for me an age of anguish—he' dipped his little finger into the moisture at the bottom of the glass, carried it to his lips, tasted it, and looked sur prised—tasted.# again, and—burst into a leud laugh! My blood oiled against the monster, but before I could find words, he said: “Come, come, young gentleman, there is no harm done after all. Here has been a lucky mistake. You have taken a dose of Epsom salts instead of oxa- lic acid, and it will cool your blood and dé you a great deal of good, and you will bé*all ‘the better for it to-morrow, and thankful that you are alive and kicking. Say-your prayers, thank God for all his mercies, and go to sl Good night.” And with these words, and a ha? ha! ha! he closed the door. 1n a minute the whole house rang with the sage sound—every creature was giggling and chuckling, and I heard their smo- thered titters as they passed the door.

From an agony of dread I now passed instan taneously to an agony-ef shame. My tragedy had, in a second, been converted to burlesque. I thought I should never survive it; but of suicide I thought no more. But nature was exhausted, and in spite of my trouble, I fell asleep, and woke only at nearly twelve o'clock the next morning, when the maid knocked at my door, telling me the hour, and that she had two general-post letters for me, for the postage of which she would thank me, as her mistress had no change. I now thought of the few shillings which I had been so anxious to get rid of as useless to me the night before, and right glad was I of their assistance at this moment. The postage was thrust under the door, and the letters were’ then made over to me through the same channel. I had no mind indeed to show my face if I could avoid it. The letters were from my father, and my brother the ensign. On opening the first, my eyes were gratefully surprised by the sight of a twenty pound note, which, as I hastily unclosed the en- velope, escaped from its confinement, unfolding its beauties to my delighted view as it fluttered, opening as it fell, to the ground.« These are the friends it always. glads us to see—these are the friends it always grieves us to part with. I took it up, folded its dear form with a tender and re- spectful hand, gazed fondly at its figure, and re- verently committed it to my long widowed pock- et-book, then read my father’s letter, which ran in these terms:—

“Dear Henry—I trust that the short trial to which I have subjected you, will haye had the effect of teaching you a lesson of worldly pru- dence, and convincing you of the necessity of looking after the main chance. There is nothing to be done in this world, my dear boy, without money; and you must by this time have disco- vered, if I am not greatly mistaken, the difficulty of procuring it. There is a road to a certain independence now open to you; and as you know my wishes, and perhaps now better“under- stand your own interests, I am not without hopes that you will conquer your romantic notions and follow it. But decide for yourself. Weigh my situation; consider how many of your brothers and sisters I have to provide for, and how con- fined are my means; then make your final choice.