Page:The Green Bag (1889–1914), Volume 24.pdf/405

 370

The Green Bag Broke the loving promises he eight years ago did plight, Then centered his affections on a girl that isn't white, She's dusky Georgia May , last name unknown. (I'm telling his short-comings in an undertone.) And just because he's guilty and I've found he isn't true, He says he'll kill me with his pistol and kick me with his shoe. This year, on unlucky Friday, April twenty-six, He carried out his plan of beating me with sticks. The big end of a buggy whip is what the villian used, And from my head and arms the blood did freely ooze. From such inhumane treatment, I'd like to get relieved, And this I'm entitled to, if my story is believed. I'd like you to enjoin him and make him stay away, And let me live at home with my babies day by day. The household goods I'd like to have and alimony if you please; Better give the coin to me, he'll fling it to the breeze. He's young and stout and able to work and hustle, That's better than licking me to exercise his muscle. Lots 25 and 26, Block Two, Westport Addition to Sapulpa, I own, (The deed was made to Henry), but I want it for my home. Now don't forget my lawyers, they helped me out in this, An attorney fee, PENDENTE LITE, I'm sure will not come in amiss. WHEREFORE, Judge, to you plaintiff prays for a decree That from the bonds of matrimony will ever set her free; Also the children, to feed and clothe and send to school, She'll teach them good manners, and to observe the Golden Rule. As from her fireside defendant so frequently did roam, She'd like to have the house and lots, to make her earthly home, And the household goods in it she'll need, And for these she will ever plead; And to her lawyers, a hundred-dollar fee, without subtraction, Also, please charge up to Henry the costs of this action. Hughes & Miller, Attorney for Plaintiff.

ANOTHER SACROSANCT INDICT MENT 44 S everyone knows," observes a •**• Philadelphia lawyer, "the court cannot concern itself, in any case before it, with side issues, these are rigorously excluded. This principle was curiously illustrated in a trial in a western state I had the pleasure to attend. "The charge was one of forgery. During the course of his testimony a witness for the defense contrived to slip in the statement: — "'I know that the prisoner cannot write his own name.'" "'All this is excluded,' said the judge, peremptorily, 'The prisoner is

not charged with writing his own name, but that of some one else.'" GEORGE ELIOT USED A LEGAL OPINION IT is said that George Eliot often sought advice from her friend Frederic Harrison in regard to points of law that came up in the course of her stories. She particularly needed advice in a vital part of "Felix Holt," for, conscientious worker as she was, and as all really great artists are, she was not content to make a guess. Mr. Harrison listened gravely to the pre sentation of her problem as if it con cerned real individuals.