Page:The Green Bag (1889–1914), Volume 24.pdf/247

 218

The Green Bag

"The deceased — the dead man!" "Oh," said Elijah, "ef yo' refers to de dead man, I begins to un'erstan'. Ef I don't disremember, I heahs dat he had a rattlin' of de brain." "Rattling of the brain? What is that?" "Well, sah, it ain't exactly a misery of de stomach, but it ain't fur from it; an' it's jest 'bout as painful as flintin' at de heart, or ketchin' of de j'ints, or settlin' of de bones; an' ef I makes no mistake, it ain't so powerful fur from ringin' in de years, an' twitchin' of de skull."

A HINT FROM THE BENCH ANEW YORK lawyer not long ago encountered a Tartar in the shape of an irascible witnesp who resented in no uncertain way the manner in which he was being cross-examined by the lawyer. Finally, when counsel put to the wit ness certain questions that seemed to the latter to reflect upon his personal character, the irritated man on the stand burst forth with : — "If you ask me that again, I'll give you a thump on the nose." Immediately counsel appealed to the court, pointing out that an answer was

necessary to the proper conduct of the cross-examination, and concluding with the inquiry : — "What would your Honor advise me to do?" "If you are determined to put that question," said the judge, "I should advise you to move a little from the witness." POETIC JUSTICE THE following is a case of poetic justice as meted out in France. A well-known Parisian architect was sitting in his office when he heard a knock at the door. As he wished to be alone, he took no notice of the knock, but went on with his work. A few moments later he heard a key moving in the lock. Not doubting that his visitor was a burglar, the architect armed himself with a revolver and quietly hid behind some curtains. Pres ently the thief entered and proceeded to rifle the place. Then suddenly he started and grew pale. In a mirror he had seen a revolver leveled at his head from behind the curtains. "Open the window," ordered the architect, "and shout, 'Police!'" The burglar had no alternative but to obey, and so summoned the officer by whom he was to be arrested.

Tht Editer will be glad to receivefor this department anything likely to entertain the readers tf the Green Bag in the may of legal antiquities, facetitt, and mecdotts.

USELESS BUT ENTERTAINING To David Cohen was entrusted no part of the responsibility for the fate of Daniel Lynch, under indictment in New York for murder. Cohen was the first talesman called. Counsel asked him if he knew the difference between "delibera tion" and "premeditation." "I do," declared Cohen, firmly. "Them's the weapons the man killed the other fellow with." —- Virginia Law Register.

Billy Allyne and Dan Riley mixed it up with their fists on Lincoln's birthday on Fleet street. "They were fighting hard, exchanging blow for blow, and a great crowd was around," said Officer Falk. "We were only fooling," said Dan to Judge Burke. "Yes, we were friends, and just having some fun," said Billie.