Page:The Green Bag (1889–1914), Volume 22.pdf/451

 The Editor's Bag USELESS BUT ENTERTAINING

427

A TENDER-HEARTED SCOUNDREL

PROCEDURE AT SEA

"James M. Beck, Esq., attorney for the American Sugar Reﬁning Co., was crossing the Atlantic in company with a distinguished member of the bench. Mr. Beck is rather susceptible to seasickness, and on the second day out traveling was somewhat rough. As he leaned over the steamship rail discon solately, his friend the judge approached and asked in a superior tone:— "Feeling bad, eh, Jimmy? Can I do any thing for you?" Mr. Beck drew himself up to the top of his stature and said in formal tones:— "Yes, your honor. I would like you to overrule this motion!" ONE LAWYER AND TWO HONEST MEN In one of the interior counties a case was called that had long been in litigation. The justice thought it impracticable to keep the suit longer in court, and advised the parties to refer the matter. After due de liberation they assented, agreeing to refer the case to three honest men. With a grave smile, in perfect keeping with judicial dignity, the Judge said that the case involved certain legal points which would require one of the referees, at least, to have some knowledge of the law; therefore, he would suggest the pro priety of selecting one lawyer and two honest men.

e-“u Q-.-_a.~_

Magistrate (to Prisoner).

"If you were

there for no dishonest purposes why were you in your stockinged feet?" Prisoner. "I 'eard there was sickness in the family." (Reproduced by Special Permis sion of the Proprietors of Punch.)

of physician and lawyer, and late one after noon the newly-made medico dashed into the room of his legal friend, exclaimin "congratulate me, old man. i've got a patient at last. Just on my way to see him now!"

The following c‘onversation was heard at Rochester County Court last month :-— His Honor Judge Shortt (to a plaintiﬁ)—-— Where does the defendant live? Plaintiﬂ—-Hoo, sir.

The legal light slapped his friend enthusi astically on the back. "Delighted,

old chap,"

he

cried.

Then,

after a slight pause, he added with a sly grin: “I say, let me go with you. Perhaps he hasn't made his Wlll yet."-—Saturday journal.

His Honor—The defendant. Plaintiff—Hoo, sir.

His Honor-The defendant, I said, the defendant. Plaintiﬂ-Hoo, sir. His Honor (to Registrar)—Is this witness deaf-eh? not deaf. Well, where does the

defendant live? Plaintiﬁ—Hoo, sir.

His Honor-Where does he live, in what house?

Plainti£f—He lives at H00, sir. Then the Registrar explained to the Judge that H00 was an adjacent village. -—-Londnn Law Notes. Two college chums happened to enter simultaneously upon their respective careers

"Dad," said the youngest son of Mr. Briefer, K.C., “I want to ask you a question about law. Supposing a man had a pea cock and the peacock went into another man's garden and laid an egg, who would the egg belong to P" Briefer was relieved; this was an easier one

than usual. “The egg, my son, would be long to the man who owned the peacock,” he said, "but the man on whose garden it was laid would have good cause for an action for trespass.

“ hank you, dad."

Silence for a brief

space, and then: “But, dad, can 2. peacock — can la

an egg?" Law

The Editor will be glad to receive for this department anything likely to entertain the readers of the Green Bag in the may of legal antiquities, facetia, and anecdotes.

ournal.