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THE GREEN BAG

he know a little law, so much the bet ter." Of one Common Pleas Bench it was re marked, "Judge A. is a lawyer; Judge B. is a gentleman; Judge C. is neither a lawyer nor a gentleman." At a banquet to the Supreme Court, a distinguished and well-loved member of the Bar., many years ago, closed his response to a toast : "With the per curs, And the Mercurs To with the Supreme Court." His taste was deplorable, but perhaps his conscience was somewhat clearer than that of a newly elected justice who is reported to have said in consultation : "I know the appellant; he's a of judgment!" Of necessity the usual attitude of the Bar toward the Bench is expressed in the phrase, suaviter in ntodo. But sometimes a bold spirit is found independent enough to brave and rebuke contemptible acts upon the Bench. On these occasions, as when the prophets of old, in the might of their spiritual power, rebuked the wicked kings, God and one have made a majority. Counsel, thinking from a pause in the remarks from the Bench that the court has finished what he has to say, attempts to reply. "Mr. Blank," shouts the judge, "I want you to learn to keep your mouth shut when the court is talking." A few moments later the judge, regretting his vicious vio lence, calls counsel up to the side bar, and tries to make it straight with him. "No, your honor," answers the attorney, raising his voice so that everyone in the room can hear, "your insult was a public one, and I shall accept no apology except a public apology!" While a witness is being examined the trial judge calls to him a friend with whom he holds a whispered conversation for sev eral minutes. Returning to his judicial duties, he wheels suddenly around in his chair and says, "That's not evidence."
 * I am in favor of affirming the

"If your honor," thunders the crossquestioner, "had been listening to what went before, instead of talking to Mr. Blank, your honor would see at once that that is evidence." And his honor, after having the stenographer's notes read to him, is manly enough to admit that it is evidence and to allow the question. Only an old and tried war horse could venture such a rebuke. Younger men are helpless. Two young attorneys are trying a copyright case involving very close and complex questions of law and fact; the pre siding judge, impatient of delays, says, "You both seem to be afraid to try the case." The counsel for the defendant is finally victorious by wresting his defense from the unwilling lips of the plaintiff himself; but his client will never consult him again, ancT it is impossible to say how much damage will result to his reputation. "Oh, the times! Oh, the customs!" Thus many a green and hopeful advocate, bruised by the first arrows from Olympus. The books say the law is an honorable pro fession; some of the judges seem to entertain an opposite opinion, at least as to its neo phytes. A sensitive young man is often made to endure torments from the Bench. Some times it's good for him. Occasionally, per haps, it is merited. Oftener, however, the punishment is inflicted for no purpose retri butive or corrective, but represents merely the wanton use of power; analogous to kicking a man when he's down, or hitting a man who cannot strike back. It is a human weakness to try one's wits on an obvious butt. The humor of the Bench finds ready and appreciative hearers. Needs must when the judex jokes. The power once exercised grows sweeter with use. Occasionally a brilliant judge acts as if he regards the proceedings before him as pro vided solely for his intellectual entertain ment. He enjoys it all hugely. No judge should be lacking in humor, but God forbid that he should regard each case chiefly as. joke or an opportunity for one.