Page:The Green Bag (1889–1914), Volume 17.pdf/709

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THE GREEN BAG

years ago, John Sprague was a plaintiff in this case: He died about ten years ago, leav ing surviving him, one child, his sole heir, a girl. This girl married one Lucius B. Farwell, from whom she was divorced some four years ago. She had, however, entered into a post nuptial agreement with her husband, which I believe to be a good and valid agreement —" The judge cleared his throat after the man ner of stage-thunder, and glaring at the his tory-ridden attorney, said: "Whom do you represent, sir? Skip the family scandals, and come to the point." "I am representing Darius Green." "And his flying machine," softly quoted a voice behind the speaker, who thereupon turned a pink which seemed a faint reflection of the judicial countenance before him. "In order to properly present my objections to the granting of this motion, your honor, I shall need to have the depositions of two parties at present resident in Brazil, South America." An audible sigh of relief spread over the crowded room. "I therefore ask your honor that this mo tion be continued and set down on the con tested motion calendar for hearing not sooner than three months from date." "I am agreeable to that," broke in the at torney who had caused all the trouble. "Write out your motion," snapped the judge, "and give it to the clerk. Call the next motion, Mr. Clerk." As the attorney turned away from the clerk's desk, he was seized upon by the throng of retreating lawyers, who, in mingled amuse ment and relief shook hands with him and slapped his broad back. Finally one said: ' ' Remember me to Mr. Green most cor dially." "I can't do that," was the quick reply. "He's dead." "Dead?" came the query. "I thought you said you were representing him?" "I am. I'm his executor." CHICAGO, ILL., October, 1905. Sunday Services. — 'The Court (Judge Kavanagh) — I will allow you $480 for your ser vices in the matter. ATTORNEY — If your honor please, I think my bill should be allowed in full — S6oo.

Probably your honor has omitted a very im portant item, the work done on Sunday. THE COURT — I did not count that. You should have been attending to your religious duties on that day. ATTORNEY — I esteemed it a religious duty to defeat these scoundrels. THE COURT — For that you get your re ward hereafter. Mr. Clerk, enter the attor ney's compensation "$480 here, $120 in heaven." ATTORNEY — But, your honor, what secur ity have I that the order will be there recog nized? COURT — Never mind; I will be there, and if necessary I will have you sent for. — Chi cago Inter-Ocean. Indigestion. — The following incident cer tainly did not take place either in Massachu setts or Xew York, where the bugbear of a relentless Board of Bar Examiners stares the student in the face from his first lecture. We will in charity let the location remain a secret. A fledgling attorney had as his first client, a merchant who had received a consignment of China silk not up to contract requirements, and desired to know what his proper course was in regard to payment, etc. The young man being somewhat nonplussed, asked for time to consider the matter, and a little later visited an older brother at the bar as "senior counsel." After stating the details of the case, he said. " Xow I've looked in all the digests under China, and under silk, and I can't find a thing which bears on this case." Judge Derby and Saco's Court House. — Shortly after the court house at Alfred, Me., was remodeled. Judge Derby of Saco was chatting in the old Central House with a young fellow who had recently been admitted to practice, when the latter suggested that they go up to the court house and look it over. "All right," said the judge; "let's view the ground where we shall shortly lie." — Boston Herald. Signs. — Lawyers should take care not to allow themselves to become bound by set forms of language in examination of witnesses, otherwise the effect of some otherwise telling